First of all please don’t call it a problem.

There is no problem as such, only situation.

And there is always a way to handle that situation

For some choosing, a way to a situation doesn’t come easily. It can feel very challenging and when you’ve been told how important it is to identify a way and it doesn’t come quickly and easily, the pressure to choose can feel overwhelming and uncomfortable.

Part of that keeps us stuck is that we take ourselves and the process too seriously. We turn it into a big deal and wind up getting increasingly frustrated with the whole thing, and with ourselves. Suddenly the process has become another thing to beat ourselves up about. Needless to say, the frustration and self-flagellation just further block our creativity and intuition, and the next thing we know, we are in this awful cycle, like a hamster on an exercise wheel, spinning around and around and getting nowhere.

Take a few deep breaths. Let yourself off the hook. See if you can approach the process with an attitude of play. Think of it as a jigsaw puzzle – challenging but fun. The Point isn’t to finish as quickly as possible; the point is to enjoy the journeying to find the way that is right for you.

As with any jigsaw puzzle, first, you sort through all the pieces to find the edges, the pieces easiest to identify and put together. Then you take your time sorting through the rest. You pick one piece up, you compare it to the bigger picture on the box, and you try to figure out where it might go. One piece at a time, the pictures come together. When you get tired or bored or frustrated, or you just feel drawn to do something else, get up and walk away, and as you go about the rest of your day, don’t stress out about whether you’ll ever get the puzzle finished.

Some days you might spend an hour or two with it, other times only minutes. Maybe every once in a while you stop for mere seconds, pick up a piece or two, and pop them right in where they fit as you pass by. Maybe a friend or family member stop by for a visit, picks up that piece that’s been making you crazy for days, and pops it right into place for you.

Choosing a way you can feel passionate about serving can be enjoyable and immediately rewarding if you approach the process with an open mind and an attitude of play, reaching out for help from family, friends, or a professional business coach to guide you.

Approach them with the spirit of play. Don’t analyze; just jot down whatever answers come to you. Make it a game, listing as many ideas and possibilities as you can think of. If you’re still having difficulty, ask someone to play with you. Someone outside your process can offer ideas and suggestions that occur to them, which you may not have the objectivity to consider. Remember to turn your inner censor off for this process. If you need to, let it go of the process altogether for a while and move on. Releasing the pressure of having to choose sometimes allows ideas they were blocked to come racing through.

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